Catch These Hands!
Catch These Hands was the first zine I created. I put it together in May of 2018, following the advice of a friend. I'd shared a few of the small things I'd written with her and she suggested I make a zine. At the time, whenever I felt the need to get something out of my head or express a strong emotion, or I just needed to record a couple of words that echoed in my mind, I would add it to a notes page in my phone labeled "short stories." At first I didn't see it as poetry, just written expressions of emotion. They were formless and needed a place to rest outside of the confines of my mind. As I began to record more of these expressions, I began to view them as rudimentary poems. The same friend that suggested I make a zine, gave me her copy of Salt by Nayyirah Waheed and I was enchanted. Whenever I need inspiration or just need to surround myself with beauty, this is one of my go-tos. Anyway, reading Salt made me want to keep writing. When I finally did ready myself to make the zine, I gathered all of the poems I'd written that year and picked through them to see which ones really stood out to me. I ended up using 21 poems and an excerpt from Beloved, by Toni Morrison, which I was reading at the time. The excerpt felt very much in line with what I was trying to say with my poetry. Toni Morrison is one of my favorite authors. Once I had the writing together, I chose the images. Nearly all of the images included are drawings that no longer exist. Erasure is a major part of my visual art process, and I wanted to include drawings that I had erased or destroyed. Boxing is also a major part of my practice, so most of the drawings have a boxing theme.
As I share a few of the poems here, I hope you will connect with them. Please message me if you're interested in getting a copy.
Submission
Because she was afraid
She missed her chance
To shoot her shot
To take that leap
To fall
To fail
To grow
To share
To learn to care
To open herself up
To make room for
Her life to begin.
Was it because she was afraid?
Or
Was it that she let fear take over her
Bully her.
Her life was her own
And yet.
She gave it away
To fear.
Question
When did I decide that I wasn't enough?
Not good enough.
Was too much.
When did I decide that was my truth?
When did I decide?
That I was too big.
Too small.
Too round.
Too flat.
When did I decide?
When did less become enough?
Mediocre become standard.
Confusion reality...
Settling acceptable?
When did I decide?
To refuse to believe
The best was possible
For me?
When did I
Make up my mind
To refuse
To love
Me?
Restored
Trying to find my breath...
Catch up to it...
Catch it...
Make it part of me again...
Something that was lost...
Part stolen...
Part given...
Returned
Healing Truth
This body is a gift.
Given to me by
Love.
I am thankful for this body.
I will no longer apologize for this body.
I will no longer curse this body.
I will care for this body.
I will love this body.
Because I am
Loved.
Maturity
Growth is difficult
It requires pain
Which is unpleasant
Yet we must be vigilant
Lest we become gluttons for our pain
Pack rats...tenderly storing it away.
To hold to tight to pain is as reckless
As it is to fear and run from it
Pain is necessary
But it must also be released once it is felt
It is something we must learn from.
But the tighter you hold on
The longer you keep it
Pain turns to bitterness
Bitterness blocks truth
Stunts growth
And keeps you stagnant.
If pain is weakness leaving the body
Bitterness is weakness
Taking up permanent residence.
So pain must be felt
But only for its allotted time.
In order to grow stronger
We must learn:
Breathe through the pain...
Exhale...
And let go.
Affirmation
I am here
And therefore
I belong.
I will not apologize
For the space I require
For the space I inhabit
For the space I take up.
I am here.
Because
I belong.
#poetry #ragart #catchthesehands #zine #blackartist #blackart